Sexting
Sexting is a complex topic, and it’s okay to have questions. This page will help you understand what healthy boundaries look like, recognise the risks, and know your rights. If you’re feeling pressured or unsure, support is available—you're not alone in navigating this.
What is sexting?
Sexting is when someone sends a sexual message to someone else. This could include sending nude images, talking about sexual activities or doing sexual activities on a live stream. It can happen between partners, friends or even strangers online. Sexting can be harmless as long as you’re both over 18 years old, but it can go wrong. Not everyone in a relationship takes part in sexting, so if it makes you uncomfortable, don’t feel like you have to do it.
There is support available if things do go wrong, and it’s important not to feel embarrassed or guilty for having to seek help. Having a nude image of yourself shared or being threatened is not your fault! Sexting should always be consensual for everyone involved.
Being pressured into sending a message with sexual content is never okay. Someone may pressure you by:
- Asking you over and over again
- Bribing you with money or gifts
- Making it seem like you owe them something
- Telling you that they will be sad or hurt if you don’t send them a nude, sometimes even threatening suicide or self-harm.
I used to think sexting was just part of dating, but I learned it’s okay to set boundaries that feel right for me. Knowing I can say no has made me feel more confident and in control.
Important things to consider with sexting
With social media being so popular now, sexting has become a natural part of many relationships. If you and your partner or friend feel ready to start sexting, there are a few things that you should consider:
- Sexting can be messages or images: Whether it is sexual messages or pictures, make sure that you set your boundaries so that neither one of you goes too far.
- Age: Are you both over 18? If one of you (or both of you) is under 18, then you will be breaking the law by sexting. This is especially true if you share images of each other.
- Privacy: It is really important that you respect each others’ privacy. This is an intimate part of a relationship and you should treat each other with respect.
- Consent: Both individuals should consent to taking part in this. Just because you have consented to something once, this does not mean that your partner can assume that you will consent every time. If either one of the people in the relationship says that they want to stop sexting, you need to stop.
I sent someone a nude and now I regret it
If you’re worried about what might happen, there are things you can do:
- Ask them to delete the message: Remember that images can be saved from any app, including Snapchat.
- Don’t give in to pressure to send more: Ignore any requests or threats that you receive to send more images. This prevents the other person from feeling that they can control your decisions and actions.
- Reach out: Telling someone you trust - such as a parent, friend or teacher – can be scary. However, it is an important step in seeking support and putting an end to any inappropriate conduct.
- Report it: If you’re under 18, you can make a report to CEOP. Asking or threatening someone under 18 for nudes is illegal. If you’re over 18, posting an image online without your consent is also illegal.
Somebody keeps asking me for nude pictures, what should I do?
Ask Them to Stop
Use the Block Function
Ignore Them
Contact CEOP
Get support, speak to us
Talking to someone about sexting helped me see things more clearly and set boundaries I’m comfortable with. Now I feel safer and more in control of my choices.
I think I might need some help... what do I do?
Sexting can be a big part of a relationship, and is often the first sign that relationships are developing into a sexual nature. Sexual relationships are a completely natural part of life as you develop.
There are a few things that you need to consider with sexting, and sometimes it can go too far or start to make you feel uncomfortable. If something happens that you are not happy about, reach out and get support.
GET SUPPORT
SPEAK TO US
SPEAK TO A TRUSTED ADULT
CONTACT CEOP
Can I ask someone for a nude?
If you’re flirting or in a relationship with someone, it can be tempting to begin sexting or ask for nudes. It’s important to remember that asking for this can make someone feel uncomfortable. Before you ask, think about:
- How old you both are: Remember that it’s illegal to ask someone under 18 to send a nude. If you’re under 18, it’s illegal for you to send a nude to someone else.
- Whether you’ve put pressure on the other person: Making someone feel guilty for not sending a nude is pressure. Remember that sexting should always be consensual and you should respect the other person’s decision. If you pressure them, you cannot get consent.
If you do decide to ask them to start sexting, make sure they understand that you’re not pressuring them into anything, and they have every right to say no. Explain to them that if they don’t want to, you won’t be upset and it won’t affect your relationship. Whatever they say, you should respect their decision. Remember that if they consent to sexting – or anything else – on one occasion, this does not mean that you can assume their consent in the future.